What to do...

Below is a post that I wrote back in Sept. and wasn't sure what to do with and so I never published it. Needless to say, some of the information is a little bit dated, but not by too much. I decided to still publish it, because it is still how I feel, but contrary to what I said below, I have now made a decision about the predicament I mentioned I'm in with time at the computer. I have decided to keep this blog, but change the format a bit to include, as I mention below, a more comprehensive expression of our lives. Also, I have decided that the way to connect everything that I do online to keep in touch with people, is to post here and have it linked to facebook so that all the blog updates will show up as notes on there and then post all the photo album stuff to facebook as well. For those who are not facebookers (yet!) I will try to keep you individually updated with maybe larger quantity (covering more time periods) photo uploads in Bubbleshare. I'd like to eventually get rid of that site, but we'll see about that when the time comes. Anyhow, this is my new plan...

The only other thing I wanted to share with you all, since I wrote the following post in Sept. is that God has totally been doing awesome things in all the areas I mention. First off, through the amazing gift of a very close family member, we were able to pay off all of our outstanding debt that we had not been able to make payment arrangements with and had not been paying anything to, since we had no money to give them. This was nearly $10,000 worth of debt - just off our shoulders! Incredible! We were thankful beyond words. This was about a month ago, that this happened. We still have a huge amount of debt left to pay off, but it is all at least under control now. We have payments set up with all our creditors and are steadily paying on our debts. So, this alone is a huge relief. 

Second, right around this same time, a job opening arose through a friend (a friend found it for Ben and Ben would also be working for another friend), that will totally meet our financial needs at quite a lot less hours and will soon pay even more than we'd been making! Also, it's a lot less stressful and tiring physically, which is a huge plus, since one of the hardest things for Ben was that when he would get home after long hours of work, he hardly had the energy and strength to do all the fun stuff he wanted to with us. God is so amazing in his provision for us! These are two huge circumstance changes that I believe are the fulfillment of us trusting and believing in what God has said he would do - he would take care of us; he would provide for all our needs.

I know this is the stuff of walking with God... and many of you know these realities in your lives. But it is so incredible when you experience them for yourself and when they aren't just a really cool story that someone tells you. It's real! God's goodness is real and available and way bigger than we can even imagine! It's for me, for us -- really for us!

So there you have it! 

Sorry to make this overall post so long, but I wanted to bring you all up to date on everything that's been happening and also to give you some context on where I'm at with our techno-connection to all of you.

[Post from Sept. 9, 2008]

So, a little more candid post today...

I've been thinking about this for a while and I still haven't totally come up with a decision, but I thought I'd just get this out there...

I feel like there is so much going on in our lives and I really want to share more of that with all of you that are connected to us from near and far. So, I've recently been in touch with a lot of friends from the past and far away and also been wanting to do another blog - a different sort of blog to share the more in depth parts of my/our lives. Also, I want to just be more active in getting posts up and more current and not just about the boys - even though that is pretty much my FAVORITE subject! And... I also want to maximize my time on the computer since the time I spend on it now is not just for blogging and pics, etc. and I really don't want to neglect the other really important things in my life for time on the computer.

So, I don't exactly know yet what my solution will be to all this, but my hope is to consolidate a bit and have more things on one site and also to have that be a deeper, more intimate view of our lives and world and passions, than this has been.

Please feel free to send me your thoughts on any of this. I would love some feedback...

In the meantime, here's a little of what's been up with us. Ben has been, as most of you know, working two jobs for about 6 months now. It has been a rigorous schedule, but he has been handling it with grace and determination. The hardest part of this, of course, is the loss of time together. But we are trying to maximize what we get, by trying to get all our seperate "adult house chores" done as quickly and efficiently as possible, so the remaining time can be spent just enjoying each other. 

So, we have been doing all this to create a situation in which we can deal with our overwhelming debt and actually make some head way on paying it off. And we've been excited because that seems like it has been working. But just recently we found out that Ben's job is changing owners and that we may not (probably will not) have some of the side benefits (bonus, paid vacation) that we have counted on just to survive, not to mention the fact that we have no idea how the new owner will be and whether he will value keeping Ben on at the rate of pay we need. So, our conclusion is that the security and the needs that his job has just barely been meeting are now in jeopardy. This was a bit of a blow to us - BUT it has left us feeling even more that we are on the verge of a breakthrough in our whole financial/career for Ben/living situation. This is exciting, in spite of the somewhat scary circumstances.

We feel like it's time to look for something else and in this time of change and transition (that's really what it's felt like for those of you who have given birth - hugely painful, but greatly rewarding) we know that the outcome will be amazing. This extends to every aspect of our lives. We know that eventually we will leave MT, but to where we don't know... We know that we will have a different and better job situation for Ben, but to what we don't know... and we know that we will live in a better home that really meets our needs, but where we don't know... So we HOPE! And this is the conclusion - the only conclusion that matters! That all we need is coming and coming soon and we have reason to be filled with Hope and Faith and Anticipation.

And as we take steps to look for another job and to find these things for which we hope, our family is our joy! The boys are so amazing and truly bring more delight to us than we'd ever imagined. Isaac is soooo bright and attentive. He is constantly making us laugh and surprising us. Just last night he put my keys in Ben's pocket (I guess because he thought he'd need them - since Ben is always having to leave in the evenings for his second job) without Ben even knowing it. And just as we were getting ready for bed, Ben felt something in his pocket and pulled out the keys. How does he know this stuff?

Isaac is always busy - constructively, though... that's the thing I love the most. His mind is always going and everywhere I take him he's always doing, finding, building, sorting, organizing, playing with... something. But the cool thing is, he's not hyper - just very active, creative. He loves taking his snacks and filling compartments in his cars and toys with them and other random toys. I am finding food and small toys in things all the time. The other day he stuffed his PB and honey sandwich down the tube of his light saber. Hmmm... that was fun! But most of the time it's not messy like that, just constructive. He usually wraps his snack (little cookies or carrots, etc.) up in various things like dryer sheets or washcloths and stuffs them in any compartment he can find, along with other toys, of course. He still is not speaking much, except for words like, mama, daddy, gon (which means "on"), bye, mo (more), no, and a few more that I can't think of right now. But the crazy thing is his comprehension is through the roof! He knows exactly what's going on and everything we are saying. And he is able to communicate just fine with all his babble and some words and lots of pointing and showing and doing. Ben and I were talking about changing his diaper one day and he just jumped down off the bed, went in the other room and came back with a clean diaper for himself and the wipies. We hadn't even said anything to him!

Anyhow, I could go on and on. We have been a little worried about his late verbal development, but then again, every child is different and as long as we know that he is comprehending and has some verbal skills that are increasing (albeit slowly) then we don't feel it's too much cause for concern.

Jacob is doing great! He is a really big boy already - weighing in at around 17.5 lbs. at 5 1/2 months. He's just really solid and strong - built just like his daddy. He LOVES watching whatever Isaac is doing and I know he's just thinking in that little head of his "if only I could do THAT!" He was just sick with a fever this last weekend and so, of course, I was a bit of a wreck. I know it's generally nothing to be worried about, and even helps build his immune system, but for some reason I don't do real well with fevers. Funny thing, too, because Ben is the "king of fevers" - every time, and I do mean every, he gets sick he always has a fever. So if the boys are anything like him, I'm in for a lot of angst I guess! Anyhow, he pulled out of it in about two days and is on the mend. He is sitting up for the most part now, but still hasn't rolled over yet. That's probably mostly my fault since I don't give a ton of tummy time. He really doesn't like it very much and with a toddler and a dog running around on the floor all the time I don't feel like it's a very safe place to leave him for stretches of time. I'm trying to work on that though. Jacob loves to smile and laugh and we are always finding new ways to get him to laugh. He just started belly laughing at his cousin the other day when she was trying to climb into the pack and play he was in. He seems to really be a social little guy, which is cool because, even though Isaac likes to play with other kids, he could just as easily and just as happily entertain himself. So, I have a feeling Jacob is going to add the social element to their relationship as they get older and become friends.

Last thing of note is that I have decided to start a little freelance graphic design business and am in the infant stages of that. I am totally new to having my own business, but am excited at the prospect of doing something I love, at home with my babies, and getting paid for it! So, I am going slowly and hoping to work into more and more clientele. I am really hoping this will take off since it would be such an awesome way for me to supplement Ben's income and perhaps eventually become even something more someday - who knows!

So, I will end here for now...look for new changes with our family postings in the future. 

Our love to all!

Ultimate Cuteness!

Okay, so I know I'm biased, but a mommy's got a right to be...

On my most recent download of pics of the boys, I thought some of these were the best photos of them I've gotten so far. So I decided to dedicate this blog post to the creme de la creme. Here they are, my favorites...

Bath Buddies

"Hey, I learned it from my big brother!"

Just chillin' on the back step...

"Wuz up, Home Slice?!"

Awwwhhh...such a sweet face.

Best Buds

Mommy's Little Men

Goof-ball!

More of the Toddler-Gangsta

"Just call me Lil' I"

Hope you enjoyed them as much as I did...

Sandler Family News: not much to report...just that we are doing well overall. Ben has been working two jobs now for a few weeks and will continue with this rigorous schedule until we are able to find another solution to our financial shortfall. He is sooooo tired most of the time, and I am so thankful to him for doing all that he is to provide for us. 

But, really, in an amazing way we are doing very well as a family. It's challenging being apart so much because of all the work that Ben has (70+ hrs. per week), and the boys and I feel his absence very much. But somehow, we are all stronger for it and we bask in the hope that God has given us that he will provide. So, we look soon for the day when we will be able to have some better circumstances, but in the meantime, we love on each other and are thankful for the beautiful children God has given us and enjoy every moment we have together.

Click HERE for our latest photos.

While we were away...

from the computer, that is.

It's been a while since I've had a chance to sit down and share all the fun things we've been up to.

Jacob has been busy growing, and I mean really growing. He is now just 13 weeks old and he weighed in at 13 lbs. 15 oz. at his 2 month well child appointment! He has been so much fun with his little personality emerging more each day. He loves to smile at us and is such a good little guy. He only cries or fusses when he needs something like feeding, diaper change, etc. It seems that he really has a sense of humor already - we've even caught him nearly laughing several times already. He loves to look around and gets really excited when he can look over mommy's shoulder.

He recently has discovered his big brother and loves to watch as Isaac plays. Jacob follows Isaac's every movement around the room and smiles and laughs at things that Isaac does. Isaac is catching on to this as well and sometimes will act silly just for Jacob! It's so cute to see them already starting to interact with each other. Ben and I hadn't really thought about what fun it would be to watch that relationship develop. Having children is so amazing!

Isaac is an awesome big brother and he absolutely loves Jacob. He is so gentle and careful with him always and he is very sensitive to the fact that he is little-er than he is. He also loves to help Mommy with any little errand or chore. Isaac runs and gets diapers for me, throws things in the trash, almost anything that I ask that he can manage he loves to do. He can even open the fridge and get himself his own drink. He is just a delight! We are constantly amazed at how smart he is and what a sweet disposition he has. Just today he discovered that he could run! It was so cute, he has been walking really fast for a while, but today it was like he realized this was different and that he could go really fast! He started at one end of the kitchen and ran back and forth from the kitchen to the living room over and over, just to see how fast he could go! It was one of those moments I really wish I'd gotten on video. So cute!

We are doing great as a family. I am having the time of my life. Even with all the challenges that life holds for us right now, I feel truly privileged every day when I look at my darling little boys. I get to play with them, snuggle them to sleep, take them to the park, teach them new things, listen to their laughter, tickle their soft little tummies, kiss their sweet little cheeks and watch as they grow and make new discoveries! It is so incredible - I never imagined how much joy having little ones would bring.

I have been very busy with being a mommy of two. Both Jacob and Isaac have been wonderful babies, so easy to take everywhere with me. We have a little play group once a week and Isaac loves to play with his "buddies". A friend of ours has an organic farm and I have been working on the farm each week in exchange for freshly grown organic veggies. Ben has started playing on a men's league softball team whose season began last week. They had a great game this week with a 13 to 1 win. We love going and watching Daddy play.

We also just had a visit from Grama and Zeyda Sandler, Ben's parents from Philly. They were here for a week over Memorial Day weekend and it was a fun filled time. While they were here we had our 5th anniversary and Jacob's dedication, which was again led by his Zeyda. It was a wonderful long weekend with lots of fun family time.

So, our life is full and wonderful. We know it will only get better... Check out some new PHOTOS of our family. Love to all!

We are excited to announce...

JACOB DALTON SANDLER

(Jacob's Hebrew name is Yacov)

Born: Saturday, March 15, 2008 at 10:17am
Weight: 8 lbs. 4.5 oz. / Length: 20 in.

We are thrilled to welcome our new little boy into our family and into the world! The birth experience itself was incredible as it was so much shorter, more positive (a lot less complications) and completely drug free this time! My labor started early Saturday morning and we were at the hospital in the next few hours after that. We had decided to do a water birth at a different hospital than we were at last time, so our trip to the hospital was about 20 min. instead of 7 min. - but I did just fine. The total labor to delivery time was 8 hrs. 45 min. and Jacob was born into the water. The only little scare we had was that the cord was wrapped around his neck when he first came out and so we had to quickly get him onto the "baby warmer" and get some oxygen flowing for him. So, those first moments on my chest weren't quite as calm as we'd planned, but overall the whole experience was truly amazing!

Isaac has been adjusting well to this new little person in our home. The first few days were definitely rough, though. We had a friend bring him up to the hospital to be with us as soon as we could after the birth and he stayed the night with us in the hospital room the night we were there. Unfortunately, he was still sick with a cough and had just gotten over a fever, so he was not exactly in the best mood to start. And then he had this new little guy in the picture - taking mommy and daddy's time and attention. But now, about a week later, he has definitely taken to Jacob and is interested when he is around. He watches as I feed him and when Jacob cries he comes and tells me, pointing in Jacob's direction. He also has started to try to rock the little bouncer chair that Jacob is often in. Of course, I love this - it's so sweet the way he knows that he needs to be taken care of. We are working on the concept of "gentle" a lot right now, too! :o)

Ben was able to take almost the entire week off following the birth and my mom was here for about 5 days as well, so it was a wonderful week of bonding -- and cleaning and laundry and re-arranging the house and the boys' room (you know, the practical stuff, too). I am healing well and really feel pretty much back to normal already at only 9 days post partum! What a change from last time! Baruch Hashem!

New family pics HERE. We'll be adding more as soon as we can.

He gives and takes away...

We haven't posted in a while and so I wanted to catch you all up on our family happenings. Unfortunately, some of those happenings of late have been sad ones. My (Ellie) father passed away (after 7 long years of battling cancer) two weeks ago this past Wednesday. And so this last week was a whirlwind for us as we spent most of the week in Helena with my mom preparing for and attending the funeral.

I am truly amazed though, that in my grief and all that losing a loved one means, that God has brought so much joy to temper it all - in the form of our sweet babies. Even though our littlest is not yet born, I am so excited for his coming and appreciate more and more each day the gift that he is to our family. And then Isaac, of course, is an amazing source of comfort and joy - that in the times of loss the gift and newness of life that he possesses is so sweet to me! This was most real when as I sat and watched the pallbearers bring my dad's casket to the graveside and I was suddenly overcome with emotion and cried and cried, I buried my face in Isaac's little head as he sat on my lap and I smelled his baby hair and thought - only you, Lord, could give me such comfort in this way. I am so thankful that He never leaves us alone. The rest of the day of the funeral I had such strength and hope for the future and joy in knowing where my Daddy is that all the grief just seemed to melt away in the waves of His mercy. This is what a life with Him is all about. Knowing He is right there with you!

On a brighter note, Isaac is doing just great. He had a bout with a pretty nasty virus about 4 weeks ago and ran a fever that made us pretty nervous. But he is through it and bounced back just fine. He was the delight of his grandma and great grandma and great aunts this last week as his sweet personality just warms to most everyone he meets. He loves to play with any dog he meets and is quite "talkative" in his baby babble. He is walking so fast now, it's practically a run and it's always with much determination - he knows just where he's going and what he wants. He has figured out that the fridge holds food as well as one particular cupboard and shows me when he wants food. He has figured out how to turn the TV on and off and delights in doing this at his whim. He now knows how to climb onto the sofa with the assistance of his little "bucket-stool" which he also sits on to watch TV occasionally. It's just the right height for him. He also can climb up and back down any stairs and loves doing this just for fun. He can also back himself off the sofa and our bed - and the bed is a feat since it is quite tall. He's pretty fearless all around and so much fun to watch! He also loves to play outside in the snow especially if Avi comes out in the yard with him.

In pregnany news: I am now 32 weeks along and really getting excited. Just today I pulled out some "coming home" clothes for our new little guy. The thrill of imagining this new little one coming into our lives washed over me again as it did with Isaac and I realized just how soon it will be. We do have a name picked out now and we'll share it with you all very soon. In the meantime, here are a few "belly pics" to show just how big a boy we have coming!

Our best to all our friends and family - we love you! For lots more recent pics click HERE